Long time since i wrote a good post about girls and boys i say. So i thought, why not write bout something that might make sense to teenagers now..
Being a guy, i can tell you first hand that guys are cheap bastards who basically think about only one thing the whole time. Ya i know i am a hypocrite making fun of guys while i am a guy but come on..somebody needs to get the dog out of the bag ( i hate cats).
My favourite pastime of all time is observing male-femaale dynamics..ya basically couples bickering..no its more than tat..
Anywho, so i have come to observe a recent trend in guys. I have just realized that our partially developed male brain has found an amazing way to cope up with immaturity. THATS RIGHT FOLKS, the male brain has actually thought of something by itself. Let me elaborate (removes pants).
Guys who act strong, decisive, patient, calm and overly confident (no this is not my resume) are actually hiding their big insecurities inside them…so like a an upset stomach, it has to release sometime..cough.
So guys who are generally fun to hang out with friends act like complete boneheads when they are in a relationship. Well this is just my personal observation (hence scientific proof). The sad part is, girls who like a particular guy for maybe his humour, happy go lucky nature, calmness etc etc will get the opposite once they are in a relationship.. Now all you girls instead of asking “yaaa, why is that?” in unison, hear me out for a change.
Boys from childhood aren’t basically encouraged to be as expressive emotionally as girls are. At some point, being very vocal and expressive about something that is affecting you emotionally so openly isn’t acceptable any more by parents or the society for tat matter…whereas a girl is allowed to a certain extent,allowed to be more so because of the extreme physical changes they go through during puberty.
So what happens? Guys need to find a way to deal with their emotional problems somehow..either through drinking, smoking, going crazy on bikes…or ya…keeping it all in. So once they get a girlfriend..A person they can finally be emotionally open to , they just pour it all out thick. The girl , poor thing, becomes like a waste basket who collects their emotional excreta cause ya…you GUESSED IT…she loves him.
I know guys who are so much fun to hang out with…who behave like whiny waste baskets when they are with their girlfriends. Always complaining and insecure about EVERYTHING! Its like a complete personality change..guess what… it was a part of their personality, only that you saw the light side of their personality while the portion where the light wasn’t falling..was hidden from you.
So this article is for you girls to snap out of your Cinderella story which is horribly produced by disney. So make sure, that when you notice that your boyfriends acts like a ball-less loser in front of you but a completly different more fun guy with your friends..dump his bum…you deserve better..
By the way, A “Signs to know when to dump your girlfriend” is coming soon..what you thought? You girls are perfect? Lowwwwwddddd….(to be continued)
Note: I usually don’t have the courage to write stuff like this but i just wanted to explore a different side of me.
Whenever i think of marriage or if anyone asks me about marriage, i always say that its something i need to be a 100% sure about rationally and not only emotionally. Looking at it from another perspective i realized that when your deeply in love with someone, you do a lot of irrational things.
I was watching the animated pixar film “Up”. The first 15 minutes of the film is just about how this young boy who loves adventure meets this young girl who equally shares his enthusiam for adventure. They both become friends which through the years blossoms into love which is bonded even further through marriage. They grow old together happily and then the movie continues..(pls watch tat movie)..
When i saw the first 15 minutes of that film, for some reason i felt really uncomfortable. I started realizing that i dont even remember the first girl i ever had a crush on. The girl i was nuts about is so different now, the girl i was so madly obssessed about means nothing to me now..The girls i dated are just friends to me now…etc etc.. you get the point…i felt uncomfortable because i lost the “first” connection…i realized my first love wasnt going to be my last…I realized that emotions and relationships dont last forever.
I read biographys , watch movies and even hear experiences of my relatives and friends who speak about their “past”. Being 19 right now, more than any point in my life i have come to realize that relationships arent going to last forever in the real world..the person you couldnt live without once might just turn out to be a casual friend on facebook after a few years.
You know what makes me uncomfortable ..its not the fact that maybe by the time i do find the person i want to spend the rest of my life with.. i would have had so many failed relationships…its the fact that i will never forget those memories.
My first crush, my first rejection, my first hearbreak, my first kiss, ..these are some memories my wife will never be a part of..and i wish that it some unreasonable way she could.
What even makes it worse is stories of people who do manage to marry their first love, high school boyfriend/girlfriend going on to get married and having kids together. Old couples who love each other as much as they did the first time they laid their eyes on each other..These stories give me a slight sliver of hope that it is possible..
Infedility, divorce, back stabbing, disrespecting etc..these words are so painful when they are associated with marriage..which always has been something in my mind..very pure.
I guess watching my parents , who are still together..even though their marraige was arranged..how my mom stiill holds my dads hand..how he still looks at her..i might never have that.
Is it because i am born in a generation where dating, girlfriends are just a part of growing up? Or is it because theres no place for pure love anymore.
Whatever i have written so far sounds very idealistic because no matter what i feel , i still realize i am only 19 , i hardly have any real world experience to give me some kind of clarity on this..
I guess i just have to go on, learning and maybe finding peace with myself.
Its been really long since i wrote my last post. Thing is i just got divorced, and my ex wanted this blog too in compensation… women i tell you..so i had to fight hard to get this back. Anywho, after i hired some local rowdies to take care of her, this blog is officially mine again.
I am joking, i didnt get rowdies…i did it myself.
Anywho, so a lot has been happening lately ( Working on A Little Less Something, Worked on a Coke Advertisement for a competition for Cannes Lions and lot of music projects too!), but one of the funniest things have to be “Chanagedire”.
Unknown to common folk, this song was composed by me during the first sem of my college and it consisted of only three words “Chanagedire, chanagedire and chanagedire”…well one word. Then for 2 sems it was hidden in my twisted mind until the day it came out during the shoots of Little Less something. Like a virus, it spread everywhere and soon everyone was humming it. So it was only a matter of time before i recorded it and infected the whole world. Chanagedire means “all is good” in kannada but the funniest thing about this song is that it is very catchy. More like a African chimpanzee that doesn’t let go once it has held on to you.
After i posted it on facebook, a lot of people liked it ( i like to refer to them as “the infected”), so the infected loved the song and gave me a lot of encouragement. Like any heroin addict, they want more heroin. (damn what amazing examples i give). So Bharath one day came home and shot the music video with my brand new digicam that also has a 720p HD shooting mode (YAY!)
So this is the end result. Also , i have provided a download link for people who want to the Mp3 of chanagedire, Enjoy!
I guess we all wish we could truly know a person. Every father wishes he could know their child better, every girl hopes she can truly know her boyfriend etc etc.
Wouldn’t it be great, if we could just meet a person and when you shook hand, you instantly know who they are. Their likes, dislikes, their good habits , bad habits ,their intentions, their sensitive buttons, things that make them laugh, make them cry, food they could gorge for hours and finally people they like. You could get a heads up on whether that person is someone you should trust or steer clear from.
Unfortunately, that doesn’t happen. Like everyone else, you have to go through stages of knowing that person.
A) Heard from others/ Looks : I guess hearing about that person from others and their looks are the only two factors that the person has no control of. So if you heard good/bad stuff about them and like/dislike the way they look, you have made up a rough picture of how that person might be.
B) Talking/ Meeting first time: Well, after you have met them for the first time and spoken to them , all your earlier assumptions are either disregarded and you actually find this person interesting. So right now, you mindset about this person is : Interesting/ Awe / Fun (Good impressions)
C) Getting to know them: So, you obviously find this person interesting, so you tend to hang out with them often which leads to the beginning of an invisible bond between you both. If this person is someone you can learn from ( Experience, skill, positive attitude) you tend to go out of your way and be “your nice self” and make sure you can absorb from them as much as you can. I practically do this with anyone 5 to 10 years older than me since the things i can learn from them within 10 minutes of conversation is more than i can ever get from reading a 100 books.
If its someone your attracted to (Due to intelligence or physical attractiveness) , “your nice self” goes up one more level to ” Freakishly nice person with a 10/10 personality”. Helping them , buying things for them , laughing at their meaningless jokes, making sure they are always entertained are some of your top priorities.
D) Good Friends: Now you have passed that stage of being “your nice self” or being “formal” and you actually remove your outer “Social” skin and reveal your true self. Of course you do this gradually since the new found friend you have made is a very precious learning source to you and distancing them from you is the last thing you want. So , referring to them in a very casual way, making fun of them , no longer thinking of them as someone with knowledge or experience , basically considering that person as an alternate version of you.
In a male-female relationship , this usually refers to the stage right to the edge of the cliff to “Taking them for granted”. You consider that person as someone who will always be there in your life no matter what you say or do. You still like their presence but aren’t entirely realizing their true value.
E) Best friends: This stage i guess is one of the most unique stages i think there is. Best friend’s stage can last for a few months, years, even lifetimes. Sometimes, this stage metamorphosis into Love. Unfortunately, the ones that don’t last a lifetime are the ones plagued with the common virus that end all relationships yet is human nature: Taking things for granted.
Countless Families, Marriages, Relationships, Friendships have ended due to the fact that people take what they have for granted. Not valuing people is the BIGGEST blunder any HUMAN BEING can make.
By the way, just thought of a universal law…cough… Not Valuing people is the BIGGEST blunder any HUMAN BEING can make.
Companies that value their customers are the ones that last the longest. Hospital chains that value their patients overall medical history are the ones that are the most trusted. Pharmaceuticals who take side effects of their drugs seriously are the ones that sell the most.
So, if you DONT take your friend for granted, I guess you are enjoying a lifetime of bliss. For people who do take your friends for granted, see next point.
F) Envy, Jealously, Selfishness : Aaaahh the three nastiest words. When you take a person for granted. Your respect for them turns to envy. The success that you used to celebrate with them turns to Jealousy. The selflessness you showed takes a nasty turns to selfishness. All these emotions lead you to think ” Why do i need them in my life anyway ?” or “Am sure my life will be way better without them”
Why does this happen?
Remember i wrote in the beginning how fantastic it would be if you could just know a person’s likes and dislikes with just a hand shake? But you and me both know that doesn’t happen. As i recall, there are also cases of relationships lasting a lifetime. So there MUST be a solution right?….wait for it……………wait for it.
Honesty.
God dammit, and you thought i was gonna give you the name of some supplement you can get at a drug store… Well, unfortunately, the most cliché and repeated word in the world right now concerning relationships now is ” Honesty”. Unfortunately, its true. If you dont speak or share about how you feel, your frustrations or your troubles to your friend/Boy-girlfriend/father etc.. there’s no way your relationship will sail smoothly.
Keeping everything inside, getting your ego in the way , trying to be nice or avoiding confrontation is a sure shot way to invite 9 on the Richter scale earthquakes in your life. Forgot to mention, that being honest to others is the hardest thing in the word. Being honest to your self is even harder.
I guess, the few brave souls who aren’t deterred by their ego’s or fears and stay honest with themselves and everyone will unfairly enjoy a great life.
WARNING: EXTREMELY EMOTIONAL AND DEEP….UNLIKE KENNETH.
I like the title of this post, its fit for a movie. Been a while since i wrote a blog post about something that has been lingering in my mind for a while. Recently, i have been going to a lot of college fests , met a lot of interesting people and saw a lot of cute girls…but somethings wrong. I didn’t have a crush on any single one of them.
Either i have turned gay ( not possible since i do like checking out women…not Bi-sexual cause i find guys disgusting..) or maybe as Austin Powers once famously quoted ” I have lost my mojo.”
I remember in 5th grade, i had my first crush (awww…) and even though i can’t remember her name (Wow..guys are so typical) i do remember her though. I couldn’t recuperate that love since i got transfered to another city and again i had atleast one crush per grade (I know, and you thought i turned nasty recently ). Then i came to bangalore…ahh, i swear i have stayed in a lot of places in my childhood but nothing had a lasting impression on me like Bangalore.
Bangalore taught me that when i get angry i shouldnt say ” Hey what is your problem you rascal!”, but to say “What THE F#(K is your Math%$#^&#g Problem Lo$de Ke B#l!!!” It also taught me that if i say obvious things like ” Hey man, you came to school today?” i would be made fun of endlessly. It taught me not to oil my hair and comb is sideways like a mallu boy , That it doesn’t matter if my shoes are polished to perfection and that i shouldn’t dress up like the cast of Main Hoin Na. Honestly, i am glad it taught me all this, but it did “un-teach” me (i know theres no word like tat, Bangalore ruined my grammar too” ).
It “un-taught” me to love. Well Love is big strong word, more like, I lost the ability to have a crush. I have reached a point in my life where i just dont have a crush on anyone. Its not like i dont want to, i really do, but i lost that feeling inside. You know that really annoying way “Your heart starts beating really fast when you are around her, you start sweating , you say the most stupid things and think to yourself …did i just say tat??”
Now, i see a very cute/hot chick, and my mind is saying “DUDE, Just look at her” , but that’s it. My heart doesn’t beat faster, i don’t get nervous ..i just see a cute girl and that’s it. More than me my friend Jason is worried about it , and he keeps waiting for a call where one day i would say” Hey man, i met someone , and she is amazing”. Not to mention, he makes up for me by making out with a lot of cute girls.
Maybe i just haven’t looked hard enough or maybe this is a passing phase, but i sure hope when i one day am walking through the street and i just see a glimpse of this girl and the song “Clarity” by John Mayer plays in the background. I dont care if i never see her again, but atleast i will get that feeling back
E) Best friends: This stage i guess is one of the most unique stages i think there is. Best friend’s stage can last for a few months, years, even lifetimes. Sometimes, this stage metamorphosis into Love. Unfortunately, the ones that don’t last a lifetime are the ones plagued with the common virus that end all relationships yet is human nature: Taking things for granted. 
F) Envy, Jealously, Selfishness : Aaaahh the three nastiest words. When you take a person for granted. Your respect for them turns to envy. The success that you used to celebrate with them turns to Jealousy. The selflessness you showed takes a nasty turns to selfishness. All these emotions lead you to think ” Why do i need them in my life anyway ?” or “Am sure my life will be way better without them”
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